Leading others doesn't start with others, it starts with you. We are taught that leading others is all about inspiring, motivating and directing others to help us achieve a common-goal. Well, you can't leader others until you lead yourself. 

Self leadership is an area of business and sport that often gets neglected, but not by the great teams. The high-performing leaders and sports teams know that personal leadership development is the difference that makes the difference in the heat of battle.

The battle might be the NFL Super Bowl final, it might be the multi-billion dollar deal that's about to go pear-shaped or it might be the mounting anxiety surrounding a pandemic. Whatever the battle might be, we all need great leaders to show us the way. Lead yourself, lead others, lead always. I believe it should be in this exact order, just like the oxygen masks on a plane - you've gotta put yours on before you can be of any help to others.

Many organisations send leaders and aspiring leaders on courses and seminars focused on how to lead teams. But that's kind of back-to-front in my experience. I've seen such epic results in companies where they prioritise self-growth and personal development amongst their leaders. 

I recently interviewed a former NFL and American Ninja Warrior, Anthony Trucks, and we did a deep dive on his Identity Shift method. He recently published a book on this very method - you should go check it out here.

Anthony shared an absolute gem: "You're identity is who you are. It's what you do when you're not thinking about who you are or what you do". Just think about that for a moment. As a leader you are interacting with people every day, you're making decisions and you are impacting many stakeholders. Your identity is going to have a profound impact on every single person around you, including your business or team. And if you're carrying any resentment, imposter syndrome, guilt, doubt or anger then you are going to be making your decisions through those filters. 

Investing in yourself and uncovering your identity is a clear path to understanding what's going on beneath the surface. Do you think you could lead with more conviction and more compassion if you were able to refine your identity? You can really make shift happen when you do the work (and yes, my Anthony Trucks pun was fully intended!).

If you get a moment, be sure to check out my latest podcast episode with the legend himself, Anthony Trucks.

Full Transcript

The following is the full transcript of this weeks episode of the Life On Purpose Podcast with James Laughlin. For weekly motivation please subscribe to the Apple Podcast, Spotify or YouTube Channel. 

SPEAKERS 

James Laughlin, High Performance Leadership Coach. Former 7-Time World Champion. Host of the Life On Purpose Podcast. Executive Coach to high performers and leaders

Anthony Trucks, former NFL athlete and American Ninja Warrior on NBC

 

James Laughlin 00:00 

Welcome to Life on Purpose. My name is James Laughlin, former seven-time world champion musician and now a success coach to leaders and high performers. Each week, I bring you an inspiring leader or expert to help you live your life on purpose. Thanks for taking the time to connect today and investing in yourself. Enjoy the show!     

 

James Laughlin 00:38 

Before we jump into today's episode, I want to tell you about the purpose club. I started the purpose club quite some time ago so that I could coach people of all backgrounds. Not everybody has access to coaching. And certainly, it can be at all people's price range. So, I wanted to create a community where I coach my members each month and it's incredibly affordable. And I do a deep dive monthly live session and deliver my best techniques, strategies, and habits. And I impart great lessons on leadership, motivation, mindset, abundance, habit installation, and you're creating a lasting legacy.  There's free replays in there from all the previous live casts, there's high impact worksheets for you to take home and actually work through throughout the month, you'll receive weekly planning emails with actual planners to fill out your week, you'll get a weekly self-evaluation email, where you can evaluate yourself on all different levels, relationship, life, business, wealth, career, everything that you want, you'll get weekly journal prompts to really get your mind tuned into that higher-level thinking. And also on a monthly basis, you'll get planning worksheets and reflections for your month. So, if you would like to learn about it, please get in touch with me or someone in my team, you know, jump on Instagram jameslaughlinofficial, drop me a DM or you can email me [email protected] or just go to the website, jjlaughlin.com and check it out. Enjoy the show and I hope to see some of you guys over in the purpose club.     

 

James Laughlin 02:26 

I'm incredibly excited to welcome back Anthony trucks. Former NFL player, an incredible transformational coach. We talked about his new book Identity Shift, and he dropped some absolute bombs in today's episode. So, be sure to check in if you're a leader. If you're a parent, if you're a high performer, you're going to learn so much from tuning into today's episode. And if you enjoy it, please take a moment to leave a rating and review and share it with somebody that you love. 

 

James Laughlin 03:09 

Anthony trucks a massive, massive welcome back to the life on purpose podcast. 

 

Anthony Trucks 03:15 

Thank you for having me, man. How are you doing? 

 

James Laughlin 03:17 

So good, really good down here in New Zealand cracking on with it and doing what I love. And I’ve seen recently your book came out and you've been talking about it last time we connected over six or six or nine months ago. And it's now out! So, I thought that there's no time like the present. Let's connect, let's talk about the book. Let's get it in people's hands. It's phenomenal work that you do. And I want more people to access it. So, I guess first things first, some of the listeners will recognize you that they'll have seen our first episode together, but some will be totally new. So, I'd love to for those new listeners just for them to know a little bit more about Anthony Trucks and your story. And so, if you don't mind going through it again, it'd be amazing. It's a powerful story. I'd love to the listeners to hear about your childhood and your professional career and where you've taken things now. 

[Text Wrapping Break]My Life  

Anthony Trucks 04:07 

Yeah, man. So, in the world of what I do, I help people makeshifts happen. It's kind of the it's the plan words, but I work at identity and it comes from my childhood of not thinking that was much possible for my life I was given away as a kid in foster care and do it a whole lot as a kid growing up until the age of 14 when I finally got adopted by a really poor all white family as a black man in America, which is a very interesting dynamic and then from there I progressed on and had to fight and find a way to find myself and also find out what I'm supposed to do. It started with me trying something I wasn't good at but got really good at which is football. In a weird turn of events. I learned how to put the work in to create this sense of self that turned in these actions that got me a college scholarship to University of Oregon in college what you guys might call University, played college football there for four years had a kid. 20 years old at my first son Yep, and then met my real dad at about the same age. A couple years later got a chance to play in the NFL National Football League, which America is pretty important. And in progress past that after turning my shoulder and losing my career into life after the game, had a massive identity crisis, didn't know who I was, I had my high school sweetheart, we'd get married had that kid had two more kids. Next, you know, the marriage falling apart, businesses doing downhill, I'm not in good shape, I have no sense of self. Suicidal, quite literally, because I didn't have a sense of like, I am this guy, and nothing was there. Went to fog for a few years. And then my adoptive mom passed away for multiple sclerosis after 17-year battle. And I had this waking up of like, I got to figure my life out. And then when I did, I promised her I said, first of all, figure my life out that when I do, I'm going to give back to this world. That way you gave to me unconditionally, to do something cool. And I didn't know how to do it on the gym at the time. And then I was kind of graced with a whole lot of insights in weird ways, from weird people that directed me towards this world of saying, here's my story, let me share it with you. And let me teach you how you can actually do and create cool things in the night. So, after three years divorced, remarried, my ex-wife got in good shape. Present father have a thriving business and I now get to go back and make good on promise two after my good on promise, one, in my world is guiding people through what I call the shift method, which helps them eliminate guilt, figure themselves out and get that kind of real powerful momentum again, because once you remove that thing that's holding you back then most people they, we live perpetually in, which is that state of feeling guilty, sometimes shameful. But when I remove that because I'm taking the proper actions, not only do I get that freedom of heart to move and feel really confident, have great support from my spouse, when I build my dream, and, you know, my kids know, I'm present, and I don't feel like I'm letting anybody down. But I also achieve some really cool things. So, you get the house, the car, the money, if you want that, or you get the freedom, the peace, the joy, the control. So, I help people get to that point because that's how your makeshift happens. 

 

James Laughlin 06:46 

I love it! Makeshifts happen. It's amazing. And guilt. Can we home in on that a little bit? So yeah, I for one, so I'm a high-performance leadership coach. And for my part of that, that journey is helping others eliminate that, but I am human, I feel like I feel guilty myself. So, for me, I spent a lot of time with my son, he's five years old, it's precious, and I love it. But there's times when I've got to go to work, I've got to do the work. And there's times when I've got to look after my body. And there's times when I need to get away and have some me-time. During those times. I can feel guilty, I can. Because I'm like I could spend a bit more time with him. So how, could I deal with that? 

 

HOW CAN YOU DEAL WITH GUILT? 

Anthony Trucks 07:26 

Yeah, there's a lot of depth, a lot of depth there. And this will actually create the method because the reality is, is there's two parts, you can't always feel guilty because you're away from your son, because realistically, that's not how life is lived. I think if we are always with our kids at all times, they have a skewed perspective of what the world is like because they think that oh, dad's always home. And I think there's something along the lines of also humans needing to have something that they do to feel empowered and full, so we can actually pour out. So, if you don't do something that fills you up, you can't pour it into your kid. And then if you go the long-distance and never do that thing where you're away from the kid, the kids get into their life and go I thought what you're supposed to be at home all day, but no, you're supposed to go right so we have to model for them what it means to chase a vision, chase a dream, do something that fulfills us. And I think that also fills us up to come back. So, it's part of the elimination of that guilt is one reframing right? How do I reframe the way this concept is and then two, how do I shift the way I show up as a human, like Lillia it's the identity stuff that I talked about. You think about it, your actions that you have, that you've built, that they've created your life, I've taken these actions created my life, most of the actions come from our beliefs and our thoughts and our feelings, right? And the reality is, is people don't grasp your identities behind all of it. Your identity is who you are, what you do when you're not thinking about who you are, or what you do. So, these actions you slowly take are they are building your life in some capacity and so you wake up and they go this is my life. And most people feel stuck we feel that perpetual cycle of suck I am the guy who keeps showing up to work and I'm not really being a present father and I know that. So, when I'm working I'm not really fully expressing in my work because I get a little bit of some tugging at me or when I'm at home with my kids I know I didn't get work done so maybe I'm not providing the lifestyle stuff like man, I’m feeling guilty, I’m not really, you know, living up to this big vision I had for your life son or maybe you went to the world and said look, I'm the guy that does this. [Text Wrapping Break]I'm like really does this and you're not doing this at this point three, four years later, you now feel guilty for letting the world down, or your vision down. And all of these things come into the actions and if I can go back and go, how do I do the actions and align with myself to where it's I'm not even aware of it? It just happens because it's who I am. That's he starts making that shift and most people it's funny as you see some people that do things, I'm sure you've had some have in the past where like, they did something that was bad. And they feel guilty about in the beginning and then they go, and they create they do they build, and someone tries to oust them and go all but I know what you did. And they go Hey, I'm glad you're talking about that Robert Downey Jr. Perfect example. He was a guy that was phenomenal as an actor to get into drugs and craziness. And now he worked his way out of that hole took the actions he identifies as a whole different human. So, when he shows up and someone asked him that question, it goes really Dude, I'm not that guy anymore. What you can't say that unless you've shifted to a different identity, but you have to build into that take action towards that and eventually it becomes who you are, and you flow. All of us had the exact same capability but we are burdened and hampered by the guilt we carry every single day. That actually keeps us from desiring or feeling like we're worthy of the next new level. And then we don't actually understand how to work to a level to remove that for one day I have proof in the opposite because of my actions for who I really can be and am. 

 

James Laughlin 10:32 

That's amazing. When you think about identities, we've all got an identity what it sounds like it's subconscious it's within us so how do we tap in and figure out what our current identity is before we then start the identity shift 

 

HOW TO KNOW OUR IDENTITY BEFORE WE START THE IDENTITY SHIFT? 

Anthony Trucks 10:46 

It's a big piece of it because most people will start a path, but they do it wrong because if you think about it if I'm going to go on a path somewhere there's two points I need. I need the destination and the starting point and most people all they think about is a path in between it's like why are you even thinking about the path and what you should do and what book you should read and how you should work out you can even clarify the destination most people they'll say I want more money or I want to be happier or I want to you know to be in better shape whatever and I go okay great. That's pretty much telling me I know the city, but I don't know the address. I know the vicinity but I don't know specifics if you don't know specific you're not going to get in the car and drive away You can't GPS that and then also if I do have that destination mostly want to get to work and I go Why would you get to work if you don't even know where you're at? That makes any sense I'm not going to start the blue line because if you put GPS and go, where am I going? The other thing it says is a current location where are you at? So, I got to know that we actually do when I go to identity I go back and take a look at what is your current identity. It's comprised of six segments and when you know those six you can actually look at what the levers are, and the buttons are to actually modify and adjust that, but you'll have a starting point okay great. I may not like it may feel uncomfortable but now I know who I am I can finally see myself and I know where I want to go now let me a plan that let me say what does that look like what are the things that I must do to take the actions to not only accomplish this thing but also to feel different inside? [Text Wrapping Break][Text Wrapping Break]Because that's a big piece of it some people like for example you could go and accomplish building the business but if you build it at the expense of your son's relationship well you’ll feel like a turd inside I feel crappy it's like I got this achievement I didn't I'm not the right person so we have to think about both as accomplish this thing and shift into that identity and like to create this a competent what identity is it? So, these two pieces we actually go in and we break it down. Who are you right now? Who do you need to become that gets you there and then now you get in that flow and the cool thing is when you do it proper like right now everybody gets up with for a certain amount, I'd probably say the majority of most people's day does not have friction? That has some right it doesn't have overwhelming friction it's just like this is my day I get to a rhythm I get up in the morning what I eat for breakfast I go to work. There's a rhythm to it all we get used to the rhythm. When you want more than more is attributed to doing and being more you don't just get to have that but do what you're doing. It’s not how it works and so you're going to feel this segment of like oh it's I call it an identity gap I feel the gap of what I want from the gap of who you are. Because you are that person you have those things that are like okay, how do I feel this how I close the gap and really boils down to have you taken a look at what are the actions that you could do to where one day you've been doing them so consistently, they've been tough in the beginning but eventually where it was hard to do it. It's now hard not to do it. Like that's a special sweet spot. Because if we say, for example, everybody knows about cold calling, no one likes cold calling. Nobody does, right? That's inherent like Oh right. Well, there's one person if we know that cold calling will grow the business, we just know that right? Statistically, you can say cold calling can do well, I don't know. But for some businesses it would work now there's going to be a person that shows up and goes oh my gosh, I got a cold call. And for them, it's like pulling teeth to get to 100 calls and every call they take is it's just it's a draining of their soul they don't show up properly, right. So, what happens is that out of 100 calls, they may make 00 sales. But then you have the person that's been doing it for 10 years. And they show up and they go I'm a cold calling master. What do they do they get 100 calls one before you got your 100 calls done two they did it and not just it didn't just kind of wasn't hard, but it filled them up to do it? It felt like they were in line with their power to do it. So, when it comes down to it, this person got the 100 calls faster than you with less energy drain and they were they showed up differently at that moment. And it's not that they had a different skill set that that got developed cuz they kept doing it. It's not they have a better voice, or they have not pushed buttons better. It's just they as a human beings they show up and go it is who I am to make 100 cold calls each day. Therefore, it’ll be more painful for them to go to sleep that night. Having not accomplished that alignment and got those 100 calls done. And is that a person that was pulling teeth to get 100 done 

 

James Laughlin 15:01  

That's amazing so you can get that that pain the pain point of not doing something is enough to motivate and to get it done, but not just get it done but do it with passion. 

 

Anthony Trucks 15:09 

Yeah, because who you are now it's all in alignment thing. It's an identity thing when it's who you are to do it, it gets done with joy with a set, maybe not with joy, but you'll get it done without draining your soul. Like I for every night, for example, I did a video every day for 1333 straight days, three days, I did a nightly 90 video didn't miss it for 3.65 years. And the reason was that there are nights when I am like 11:30 at night, I got to get done by midnight. I'm like, Ah, right. But I would get out of bed, I would go find a spot record it because I was the guy that does a video a night. It was my identity, if I didn't do it, I felt gross. where somebody else goes, oh my gosh, you got to do a video. I don't want to do like, that's the pain in it because that who they are, they don't do it, they make a good excuse. And this little decision thing shows up over and over and over again. So, for me, my goal is how do I get you to shift into that person that you can go to sleep until those things are done because it's who you are. So, it's effortless effort. It's joy. 

 

James Laughlin 16:12 

And when people go through and read the book so um, we're going to make sure that on all socials that will have links to the book as it's available on Amazon. Yeah. Yep. It’s available on Amazon. Yes. And they can also come to check it out at your website. So, I just remind viewers, we'll do it at the end as well. But whereas your website anthonytrucks.com, right? 

 

Anthony Trucks 16:30 

If you go to identityshiftbook.com you can get there. 

 

James Laughlin 16:34 

Okay, great. Okay, so folks, let's by the end of this call, I'd like you to take some action. And if you're really keen to look at your identity and shift your identity, go and get the book that's it's going to be incredible. So, let's talk about the experience of the book. So, when someone gets the book, and they start working through it, what can they expect to have happened in their life, if they take action on what [Text Wrapping Break]they're reading? 

 

HOW WILL THE BOOK AFFECT THEIR LIVES? 

Anthony Trucks 16:55 

Yeah, they'll wake up one day and then look back and go Who in the world am I and that's the thing it's always this because the book is part concepts of breaking down the understanding of like identity work shows up who you are, right the other part of it goes into how do you make the shift we achieve we have is called the shift method that is a process that guides you there it's that's the thing it's the magic medicine, we'll call that actually is a thing that does what I'm talking about. So, you wake up one day, and you've achieved that thing and you feel like the person who achieves that thing I call a limitless state, has ridiculous power. So, I want you to feel inside, right. And so, the book guides you through the process and if you just read and then do what's called a reflection section at the end of it, it'll guide you there but if people go there and use- so if you go to identity shift book calm, get the book on Amazon to come back with the code, which is your receipt number. And this code lives you'll get with the book the audiobook for free, the audiobook for free and I give a $97 workbook for free which allows you to actually go through the segments and do the work in a way that ingrains a process that you literally wake up one day and some people go like well how do you know you made the shift and I go well if you wake up one day and you try to put yourself back in the headspace of who you used to be and it feels uncomfortable. If I wake up and go up the guy who used to get up late and didn't have no control of himself and then he was always emotionally all over the place had no structure to his day and no discipline. Oh, It feels weird like that's a that's an odd guy right? That's no you made the shift takes work to get out of there, but the book shows you how. 

 

 

James Laughlin 18:25 

that's phenomenal and the shift method can we talk about that for a minute so what is the shift method look like? 

 

Anthony Trucks 18:31 

Yeah, so it's three stages it's actually fairly simple from a standpoint of looking at it but the work inside is where the power comes in but it's three stages one sees then shift and then sustain so see means we take a look at essentially what are the things that you're unaware of, right? What are the parts of you that you don't see are holding you back once you figure those things out some will call them blind spots it part of it's a blind spot part of it's just you don't want to honestly own up to some of it sometimes you hear people tell you to stuff you're like I don't want to hear it you're crazy right but you know they're true. So, there's that part of it then once I've seen that I go okay great now that I understand what it says what's been affecting so I get to go okay this is what my loss is like the calculated loss because of my inability to communicate, right? Something like that. And then we go okay, now that that's gone, what is its hopeful destination I can go into where can I see a cool better future? To see phase then I go Okay, great. Now I'm going to go into the work the shift phase, most people jump to this, they go, tell me what to do. I want to know what to do that sounds good. But what if what I tell you to do isn't what you need to do need to find out what you need to do. And you'll find those things you can create your own personalized shift plan and your own identity to shift into because ideas if I can shift you into that guilt-free identity that is operating in a certain way where there's no more guilt, only joy, you do some cool things. Well, now I know that that destination is not the city but the address now. And then I know the actions don't build me into that. What do I do overtime to create that? And then now that I have that plan, the next stage is called the sustain phase. I now have to take action and sustain toward eventually becoming who I am. That's the thing all of us look at anybody in the world that started something the first day it's like I'm trying this thing the 1,000th day or two what I do like I just started boxing today 10 years later I'm a boxer yeah there's a journey right and so we show you how to sustain by what's called a discipline system but discipline system into your life you sustain this over time and then winds up happening is now you wake up and dang holy crap. I don't know when I don't know exactly what time of the day but one day I woke up and I feel like I got this limitless sense of ridiculous power and look at all the cool things I've achieved. 

 

James Laughlin 20:36 

That's amazing like takes me back to something you said many months ago and they were talking about high performance, and I was like whoa like your Tuesday morning like you do this you get up at this time and you do this and your workout and by 5 am you've achieved all this that's high performance. And you said Well, no, some people will call it high performance. I call it Tuesday morning. It's part of who you are. 

 

Anthony Trucks 20:58 

Yeah, that's different that's the thing that most people don't grasp is most of the time when individually they when they're describing someone who has success, they go all man they're high performers they, you know shoot they got a great mindset if you ask them, it's like it's just how I operate. I don't go up and go I want a high performer like no I'm just such as Anthony is what Anthony does and we describe that person doing the thing with these words, but the reality is it's what it's who you are it's not even a conversation it's just who you are You made it you made later on some would you call that maybe you would call it a high performer but like I don't know a person that's disciplined as we call it disciplined Yeah, it's really what it is you put you perform at a high level because you stay disciplined so if anybody asked him like I'm just disciplined and consistent that's it, but people go Oh, you're a high performer and I'm just I knew what I wanted to get done. I put a discipline system around it I know who I needed to be to work on these things to get there. I knew my holes in my bucket with Anthony himself at work I didn't borrow other people's habits and fixes, so I start doing things and it's kind of like saying I'm going to patch the holes on my camera just decided to go out didn't it, so it goes back again. Oh, it's back. It's kind of like saying look I got this car that happens to have you know holes in the tire and the gas isn't you know, running cleaner smooth, and the belts are off and they're you know, all that wonky stuff. Well, what I end up doing is I just go in and I just fix the things that my car has to fix I'm not going to go fix the wiper blades because that guy's wiper blades suck I'm not going to go and you know change the back tire on his on my car because his back tire had to be changed no mining, to patch the holes in the front. I needed to work on I need to get the wood called the belts lubed up and going again. I had my stuff to do. And so, what happens I just fixed those in the car drives people to go, man, your high performer, not just that just the cars driving now because I've fixed the things that my car had to work on. And that's the thing people don't grasp they want to I want to get to the point of a bit of high performance, I want to feel that energy and emotion of just getting digging in. And it's like, it doesn't feel like that. When I'm doing my thing, man. It doesn't feel like this energetic rise. It just feels like my Tuesday morning. That's how I do things consistently just inflow. It's who I end to do it. And people look and go How did you get all that done? It's like, I don't know, I just my life, man. I'm living it. I'm just living my life. But the way that I live my life, the identity that's living my life, it's accomplishing some pretty cool things. 

 

James Laughlin 23:17 

You really give a shift about your life. Do you know what I mean? It's like 

 

23:21 

Yeah, yeah, a good way to say that. Well, done. Yeah, love it. 

 

James Laughlin 23:25 

But Dad, dad jokes one on one, right? So, we got to do it. So good, now discipline, I truly believe you know, if you lack if you like discipline, then you like the results that you really, truly want. So, for people who have this, like, hey, I want to be fit, or I want to be rich, or whatever they want to be, but and they start on this journey and they're in 2,3,4, weeks and all of a sudden it gets too hard, and they give up. So, discipline clearly is not there yet so they didn't have the desire strong enough that burning desire wasn't strong enough for them to instill this discipline. So, what's your advice for people who actually want to develop hardcore discipline? |[Text Wrapping Break] 

HOW TO DEVELOP HARDCORE DISCIPLINE 

Anthony Trucks 24:05 

Yeah, you become a disciplined person. It's not there's this thing of saying I have disciplined, and I am disciplined. There’s a difference. I have discipline, right could be like I have the discipline to, to not punch my children in the face when they make me man. Good, right? I have the discipline not to. However, when I say I'm a disciplined man, that encompasses all things. I'm a disciplined person it shows up and so people ask well, how do you get the motivation, the drive, it's, I am motivated to not be the guy I used to be. I am motivated to not go downhill. I am motivated to not follow the lineman. And so, what happens is I'm motivated to perceive the level of what I carry myself at my standards and say, That's who I am. I'm going to fight every day to stay in alignment with who I am. And that and that simplistic shift, that little shift of perspective allows me to go Okay, great. I'm going to be more keenly on what I do put on my calendar, and I don't, because I don't want to fall out of alignment with myself, so I'm not going to give self-imposed deadlines that don't, they aren't even physically possible, right? I'm not going to say things about who I am not going to say I'm the guy that's going to win a Grammy this year because I'm not going to win a Grammy you don't. I mean, like it people, they set these unrealistic things to achieve. And it's so hard to get there that they feel less than because it's out of alignment with who they are or where they're really trying to go. And so, when I look at people, like how I get that motivation, it's like, hey, don't be motivated to accomplish things be motivated to become someone who accomplishes things. And it's a baby-step process. It's a journey, you have to fall in love with the day, not just the destination, what's the day look like? How can I love this thing? How can I show up knowing the things I'm doing in that Day, will bring me to that end I want to be at, and then follow up with a day and then you become a disciplined person and that disciplined person, achieve the things and get the things done, and has the good marriage and all that has the great business and puts the systems in, because a lot of the business owners I work with, they know what to do. They're phenomenal technicians, they could coach themselves out of Iraq in the middle of crazy, right, they could do it. But the thing is, is they don't they're not the person inside that does all this stuff that wraps around it for the business to function, and the relationship to function and their body to be in good shape and have it all. And so, the separation for a lot of us is just we don't identify properly. And so, we carry this old self that really is guilt-ridden. And we do the same thing to keep ingraining that over and over and over. And we never think about how I become somebody more in the real just, you know the feeling it'll be, it'll be a feeling of out of character. The best way to explain is the things you're going to have to do. They're going to feel out of character. The problem is most people go out of character. Oh, no, no, I don't want to act out of character. I go why, like, why would you not? Well, it's just it's bad, man. I know who I am. Okay, let's think about this. You're seeing out of character is bad. Why? Because to be honest, the out-of-character thing is also a positive, higher-level character. It's out of character for you, essentially, to not put McDonald's in your mouth each day. Right? It's out of character, right? So, let's put let's make it more of your character to not eat at McDonald's every day. So now what happens is, it's out of character, but it's positive. ideas like all these things that feel awkward, feel funky feel out of character? Yes. I mean, you're doing it right. It's supposed to feel like it's not who you are. Because eventually it will feel like who you are because you've done it enough. And you get this return on the investment of that person. Because we're all investment-based humans. There's a bias of, if I give something, I want something in return, I give you money. I want a burrito. If I give you money, I want a return on my investment. If I give effort and energy into something, the return I get on that investment is it's who I am. Like if I give energy to your dad before you had a kid, you want to Dad, you were a guy. And then a kid comes out and day one you're like, I guess I'm a dad. Right? But dude, after a couple of years, you're like, damn, and I'm a dad, challenge me on that I dare you too different. And what's the difference? It's not because of all, because you think you could have a kid that got spit out by some woman. You're never around? Do you like a dad? No. But it's because you invested in the return is I'm a dad. It's the same thing for all levels of life and it becomes who you are unconscious. If your kid falls or needs something, you won't even process I just go do what a good dad does, there's a time into processing just happens. It's part of your identity. And that same psychological concept applies to your work, to your health, to your relationships, everything. And we all think it's arbitrary and separate, but it's really dialed in the same. 

 

James Laughlin 28:36 

I'm so glad you mentioned that. And he talked about investment. And nowadays our feeds are covered with crypto, and NFTs the stock market all these investments so the question I actually wanted to ask you was let's say you had a couple of $1,000 to your name and you had to invest it somewhere what Yeah, what Anthony trucks invest a couple of grand in the get the best return. 

[Text Wrapping Break]BEST INVESTMENT TO SPEND YOUR MONEY ON 

Anthony Trucks 29:02 

The best return I would invest in is knowledge man. Because I here's the thing, my identity is I am the guy that will figure it out before anybody else will end with less than everybody else. Because the only separation is knowledge, right? So, if I have the knowledge, what's not the only separation if I have the knowledge and I don't execute on it, I am no good, right? It's just like a guy knows what to do. But I'm the guy that I know at a core if I execute stuff, if I buy it, I consume it, I will execute it I will dude I take courses while I'm driving and picking my kids up from school and doing things up in the airport like I'm not in there banging out to music and all new stuff I want to I'm learning right it's just a natural part of my identity so I just know stuff. So, which tells me I also have an action guy. I got a really defined discipline system and structure, so my life is actionable and then it's time to take off work with the kids I'm with the kids right today I got an hour with my youngest son called dad day. I know this stuff works and so what ends up happening is it operate in his flow and then I know that if I got the knowledge I know I would apply it therefore if I had that 1000 I'm like Look, I know who Anthony is he's the one that consumes and does what he's supposed to do beyond anybody else but give me more knowledge let me know what to do and I'll go do it and I'll end up learning more than you taught me 

 

James Laughlin 30:14 

That's powerful and folks that are listening to that you're listening to this podcast because you invest in your own self-development your own personal growth so I'm with Anthony on this like if you've got money or time to invest, invest it in yourself and choose in whatever way you want that to be whether that's buying the book, right go buy the book, that's an investment in yourself, but it only works when you do the work buy the book, then execute do the work as it says. 

 

Anthony Trucks 30:40 

Yeah. I got a caught shelf-esteem I buy that goes on the shelf, and I feel good, and I don't do anything with it. It's called shelf-esteem. 

 

James Laughlin 30:49 

I love it. You're so right. I think how many of us have self-help books and like hundreds of them, we've read them, but we've executed on maybe like half of them or one of them? 

 

 

Anthony Trucks 30:57 

Or even read the damn thing reads them. It's a weird thing man's different world, dude. It's different as all the information our fingertips now and people do anything. It's odd. It's really odd thing. We were more unhappy now than ever. And, like, it's not like you don't know what to do eaters aren't the person to do it yet. It's like giving a hammer to a newborn baby. All the tools, not the person to wield it, give it to a construction worker, that dude's building a house and apartment complex in skyrise. You know, who are you? 

 

 

 

James Laughlin 31:26 

That shelf helps that the idea of buying these self-help books and they sit on the shelf? It sounds like your book. Okay, so it sounds like it's actually like the linchpin, it's the key to the secret of, hey, you've got all this information, but your identity is not lining up, you're not taking the action, you're not doing the reading, you're not executing. So, your book could actually help unlock all the prior knowledge that people may have sitting around their homes or in their around their vicinities.  

 

Anthony Trucks 31:53 

It wouldn't so much unlock it; it would just put it into use as really what it is. It's not like I think it's I don't I don't even teach people much more like I have some clients that are business clients. But the most more important thing is I have clients that come in and go do I know; I know what to do. But I can't seem to figure out how to get it done. Like the weirdest thing I get stuck in my own head, and I have this weird like I wake up with a weird feeling in my stomach. I don't feel confident and powerful, but whatever, but I know I'm the one to carry it. I know I'm the one that had that I know it's my thing, but I can't. And as we sit down, we figure out that in the day it's just they aren't the person at their core to do that thing yet for whatever reasons whether it's imposter syndrome which is essentially the guilt around the fact that I might charge somebody for something that I haven't quite done yet. So, I feel guilty because I'm taking their money and can provide but this is a weird way of framing, but the reality is man when you get that stuff figured out like it does move different your identity shifts and flows and you accomplish way more things that are really different energy to it. 

 

James Laughlin 32:48 

And see getting back to the identity of figuring out what your current identity is. So essentially your current location What are questions that people could ask or a question that could help them figure out where they currently are out what their identity currently is? 

 

Anthony Trucks 33:02 

They're going to hate it it's going to be an out of character question but here's the answer to it at the end of the day there's this statement I love and it's hard to see the label when you're inside of the jar we're all operating inside of this jar myself included by the way it's why I got a good wife who I don't mind her telling me things I'm like that you're right so the idea is we operate in flow we don't even notice our havoc in our crazy we just were like a tornado was running around not even realizing we're a tornado and so the biggest thing I tell people is like a and you have to ask them this question you have to text your friends that you trust respect and you trust because if you don't respect them it's a problem. They go look if you could help me or you could force me to improve one area of my life that you believe is hindering me what would it be? And they'll give you something he would not going to like it I'm telling you right now it's going to be funky and weird and if you tell them and also say I will not get mad, I will not rebut, I will not refuse, I will not justify. I just need you to tell me what I need to hear. Not what I want to hear. And then let them tell you and you're going to find out the things that you do people have been like not even smile on your face and not tell you the truth. But they tell you oh damn. But if you think about it, is they'll settle in usually like yeah, damn the right. Oh, right. But now I know what to work on, which actually gives you the ability to have yourself give yourself permission to improve. We don't have to really give yourselves permission to improve things we just bury it because if you do that means you have to accept it might be right. Oh God, okay, well, you can accept this pain of acceptance of someone’s not great or accept your lack of success for longer. 

 

James Laughlin 34:38 

Hmm, that's powerful. That's really vulnerable, courageous, to reject loved ones and friends to do that. So, let's say they come back to you and they're like, hey, you know, you should probably stop drinking as much or you should maybe you know, stop talking about the gym and get to the gym, or stop eating all the rubbish food. And you feel this defensiveness come up this anx this, like, Who the hell are they? So how do you work through that process without losing a friendship and then going back to them and defending your point, how do you take that on board, 

 

Anthony Trucks 35:07 

You're just playing or you're getting to that like this is part of the method. It's not and this is one of the small lessons, but it's one of the most powerful ones. But you do as you preface it, and you tell them like, look, I can't respond to you for 24 to 48 hours, I'm not allowed to actually give you any response. And usually, I call it 48 hours flat, I can't respond to you for 48 hours flat. So, whatever you say to me, I will not say anything in response, I will just listen. And then 48 hours later, I'll reach back out and what you're doing is you're allowing them a safe space to tell you the truth. And it's in how you handle the first question that will determine whether or not you get gold because if you, they say the first thing and you get all responsive and argumentative Do you just cut off the golden goose, they're not going to give you any more insight like like I don't like dealing with this. You said you weren't right in the damage the relationship you don't get the gold. But if they go Say something crazy, and they go oh my gosh, he really just let me say that. Then the next question you would again, they go Whoa, he's really going to let me tell the truth. They'll start telling you the truth. And it all comes out and it hurts telling it's with- and people will avoid this it's the stupidest thing to avoid. Because why you must genuinely like the sucky life, you're living that just then you don't love your life. Or love the pain in your life or you actually are some wrong because if you do this, right, the idea is you're going to get to the stuff that sucks. But it'll clear the space. You know, it'll leave so much lead so many different things are going on as headaches. And then you actually find out what you can work on. And then that becomes your shift plan. The stuff you do that gets you to be that identity. You go Okay, great. I see it. So, 48 hours later you go and call them back and go look, you said some things man, they really poked me, and here's the wait 48 hours. Let's the emotion die down. It lets the emotion secede a little bit. Because if I, I say this to you, and then I'm responding now I am all emotion to logic. And they say what emotions high intelligence is low. So, I'm all emotion. And I'm not logical. But the moment that the emotion can die down, and I can go logic with it. I started listening differently. I go Yeah, yeah, you're right, right. My wife can do this. And I can get to that point within like a minute or two. I've been I've practiced it for a lot of years. And I teach it and I'm really aware I'm consciously aware of it. So, say some things that are really hit the heart like Oh, damn, really like, ah, all right, you like, but I can get to a quick cuz I realized that this is good for me. But it takes a while to practice that. But when you can do that nonstop and openly, man, your life is perpetually getting better. 

 

James Laughlin 37:33 

That's phenomenal. And you do remember personally, a time when you've reached out to someone in the last decade and asked that question. And it really hit home. What was that one thing that they said that you need to change? 

 

Anthony Trucks 37:44 

Man, was down in like 2016 I come off have not come off anything. But I was like living not the best life in a sense of I was divorced, and I, you know, multiple partners, and I'm partying and traveling and spending money and yada yada. And I just you know, I'll do my thing. And I found this day I was like; I don't like this guy. And I call my buddy Jason had some conversations. And I mean, he told me some things about how I was as a dad, the kind of man that he knew me to be that I wasn't being right now. You know, the way that he saw me talking my business now I showed up and things I was doing at work that just wasn’t professional, he told me the truth, man, and it hits because then it's like an attack on your identity. That's the thing most people feel that goes at an attack on who I am. It's not it's a bearing it's a mirror to who you are. And here's the thing, well, if I want to get dressed, I can get dressed and try to get myself buttoned up have a mirror lets me know what I look like. Then I can go and change that shirt cuz that shirt doesn’t look good, doesn’t match I can, I can brush my hair, I can look better, right? If not, you're out there walking around living a life with your hair messed up and your shirts not matching because you didn't look yourself in the mirror. So, all it does, it just give you a mirror to go. I shouldn't wear this anymore. Take it off, but so the new one, and now you can live your life with more flow. 

 

James Laughlin 38:52 

That's amazing. And you talked about attacking the identity. So essentially, the amygdala kicks in and defends it like you're being physically attacked. 

 

Anthony Trucks 39:01 

Yeah, like the ego. The ego rears up and goes no. And the ego I call EGO. Everyone's greatest obstacle. 

 

James Laughlin 39:06 

Wow, I love it. 

 

Anthony Trucks 39:08 

It's the thing that gets us gets us not to let somebody tell us what's going on. We just no, no, no, right? It's like, dang if you can get the ego to take a nap, man, it's a whole different thing. Because the ego protects whatever identity is in there. That's the thing about it. It just protects the identity. Now you can have great parts of the identity, good dad, good husband, right? 

But you can have sucky parts the identity, which maybe you suck as a business owner, and therefore because you're a good dad or a good mom, whatever it is, right? You go No, I'm great. I'm great. It's like you're not great at business. Yeah, I am. But like, it's just protecting a crappy part of your identity, because you probably aren't good at the business because maybe you're mean to your staff. Or maybe you don't serve clients very well, right. But if your identity is just being protected by this ego, it'll keep on protecting that and keep it in place. But if you can let the ego as you know, open up a little bit in that space and then let something come in, and then fix it. Then now it's protecting something better. does better for the unit in the system? Because the reality is that that entire unit is heavily affected by this part of your identity. You may think it's like I'm a good dad and I'm a good husband. Well much better of a dad or a husband could you be if the business ran smoothly we think it's separate it's not separate if my business is making me the money then I probably am less stressed I'm happier therefore, I can do cool or date days with my wife I can be in more joy when I'm with my wife, my kids can have more nice things What are better schools, I could have a great relationship with them right? If the business is doing well if it's not doing well, I might not even focus when I'm with them. Right, I can kind of be there but not being the greatest I can be we think it's all separate but no if you're protecting a part of your identity that's not serving the unit the whole identity. You're seriously in a bad space and a lot of us aren't aware of it. 

 

James Laughlin 40:48 

That's really important for leaders that are listening to life, work, balance what would traditionally call life/work balance they're separate things life and work and balancing them but what I'm hearing is you said no, it's life and within life comes business relationships, health, everything. 

 

Anthony Trucks 41:05 

We know that everybody knows that, but they don't do the work to solidify the unit they just work on the one-off piece it's weird. And everybody does it though like because we don't want to face the ego towards the place of me that sucks. I want to bide my time and not face the pain of it all. But the realistic thing is once you get to that flow here's what I think we live with this uneven unexplored and unexpected guilt daily. We don't even I don't think we realize that every day when you get up and you're going to work you know you didn't kiss your wife goodbye, your kids goodbye your kids you know, like we know if we're not close to our kids, but then you don't even do anything you get close to him. And then when the moment happens, your kids write you a note and say I wish daddy would stay home or he's always on the road. You knew that was you knew you're already doing that you've been living in that perpetual state. Think about how much you've been bogging down your current work so it's like we have these things where wear these things but we just we don't open up the door and take a look at them it's like a perpetual constant state of it. It's like that story of a farmer who had a dog and some guy walks up to the farmer looking for directions at a local church and he gets up to the dogs moaning ah you know they'll say sir how to get to the church start to tell them to go down the road here make a left- ugh... Sir, why is the dog moaning Oh cuz he's sitting on a nail well why does it get off the nail doesn't hurt him bad enough right so we live in this perpetual state of guilt not making adjustments cuz it doesn't hurt bad enough and it's just the focal point because he realized he stopped to go like that doesn't make logical sense the dog should move like why would you have any pain right so when you find a look at yourself and you see who you are and you go oh wow yeah, well, I guess didn't hurt bad enough that good to be living with has been piling up and piling up eventually is going to rub a hole in your body as you start bleeding get infected right it just happens that dog keeps that damn nails and it caused a problem we just don't as individuals get off the stinking nail 

[Text Wrapping Break]HOW DID YOU GET YOUR PERSONAL BRAND’S IDENTITY? 

James Laughlin 42:58 

Get off the nail folks, that's great advice. We've all got one of those nails in our lives somewhere or a staple whatever it is you've got it and there's all things that we've brushed under the carpet now talking about your business, so I've seen your business grow and thrive it's just been phenomenal and your personal brand like it's just it's so impressive. So, what happened along the way to help you like narrow down and get really like convergent I get that personal brand to be strong How did you get that identity? 

 

Anthony Trucks 43:29 

It was brand and branding right the brand is what leads to branding you've seen the branding, the colors, the logos, the images, the quality content apart right that's the thing, but there's got to be this brand underneath, or else it can't come to life and if it comes life outside of what it shouldn't be like if I tell you we ride Harley's and we were you know we got handlebar mustaches and our logo is a pink butterfly. Yeah, right? That branding is not in line with the brand so the first part about it was what's the brand and I realized that that is the work that I do right we serve people from a place that we know you are best suited to serve the people who are where you used to be so I kind of went back and I go okay who did I used to be and what do I used to want right it was my kind of people and I figured out why I was a guy that the time like I wasn't a good husband wasn't a good dad wasn't in good shape did have powerful aspects in control of my business so I couldn't serve the world I felt guilty because I was killing the vision I had a dream to do some but I wasn't even serving at the right level that’s how I was, man. And then I have some success I have some I make some money in business got like a good quarter-million-dollar contract less heavy profit. I was like you know I could but then I wasn't a good dad, or a good husband made some money like it's just like I looked at I go, man, I was not the guy living all of it holistically. And so, when I progressed to what I do now is a matter of taking a look and going oh, this is who I am. I'm a guy that values relationship I'm a guy that values parenthood and we got our values my you know my business and the people I serve that's who I am. So, therefore, that's my brand. And it's easy to be that that's the thing is interesting is most people try to be something different. It's like the best way you can do it is to be you because it's easy to be you, like, figure out what your brand is, then you just do that. And yes, you're going to not like everybody's not going to like you, you piss some people off. But that's fine, because the reality is, if people don't know you enough to dislike you, they don't know enough to love you. Period. So, you got to put me out there enough for someone to dislike me, then people go, this is my guy, and they’re lying with you know they're lying with you, it's smooth flowing. And then what happens is now you start creating stuff that expresses the brand. The colors that are that speak to you, or the words that speak to you, or the clothing that speaks to you, or the type of content, you create the videos like the pain points, or you're talking to, it's an extension of my actual life now, because the people that I'm working with it, they want to have that, like, I get to have a business that makes me good money, I can travel, when I want to travel, I get to spend time with my kids and really be in a relationship with them. My wife has a present husband like we have a great stinking life, man, it's been a ton of work, but it's who I am to do the things that my life needs me to do. So, I can experience this life. That’s the thing. It's not this arbitrary strategy. It's just who I am, that stuff gets done without even thinking about it. And the stuff that gets done creates this. And so, when I show up, like the brand, you've seen, builders have been me saying, this is who I am world, take it or leave it. And if you do take it, I'm going to serve you. And so, I serve them at a high level, like giving them my secrets in my system, and they apply to their life. And it works. And that's how it all grows. 

 

WHERE DO YOU SEE YOUR BRAND GOING? 

James Laughlin 46:24 

Phenomenal. Really, really phenomenal. And where do you see it going? Where's your brand, going, where’s that journey happening? 

 

Anthony Trucks 46:31 

Anthony brand will be separate from the shift method brand in time because right now it's Anthony's story that powers the shift method. But it doesn't need to be it just needs to be a human story. And if I can separate myself from the brand, two things take place one, it can go beyond me. Because if it's just me, I can't go beyond me when it's separated. So, it's a method and a concept that goes beyond me. And then two its allows me to provide something to my family as like, like a legacy. You know, like, if you look at Stephen Covey's seven habits, like it's his seven habits, but he ain't teaching it. But you can still get that get the book, you can get the concepts, all this stuff, it's all there. Therefore, his family has some kind of legacy and revenue and something that allows him to do some cool in the future because of what he created and pulled away from himself. So, the brand will grow to have an aspect where individuals can work with the company, you can come work with us. And we'll walk you through our shift method to get to the point of figuring yourself out eliminating guilt and really getting the momentum again to hit that limitless state of ridiculous power will have coaches that go Look, I really like this. And I want to use your methods for my clients beautiful will certify you to utilize a shift method. And then beyond that, you'll have corporate stuff will do so if Corporation says I really want to get our people at a level they're making shift happen every day. Beautiful. We'll work with them. So, we come in, we use our apps and our tools, and they get assigned a coach and they will work themselves through our methods. So that's the long-term thing. And then for Anthony man, I'll do other stuff. It'll be a separate brand. Therefore, I can go, and I don't know. Be a ballerina if I want you to know do what I want to do. 

 

James Laughlin 48:00 

I'll be there to clap. Yeah, I promise you 

 

Anthony Trucks 48:03 

Appreciate it I’ll be spinning circles on my head or something that they do. 

 

James Laughlin 48:07 

Beautiful. I love it. And just while you were talking about what you can do for people, can we just remind listeners where they can go to, to follow you, and to engage with your books and your products? 

 

Anthony Trucks 48:18 

Yeah, just go to @anthonytrucks. That's the simplest way to go. And if you go to identityshiftbook.com. And on Step three, use the word live. You get the freebies and some cool things that you can actually utilize and put in your life for real.  

 

WHAT’S YOUR ADVICE TO YOUR KIDS? 

James Laughlin 48:31 

That's epic. Well, one last question. Just before we wrap up if you had to give some advice to your younger self or to your kids, yeah. And the advice was around how to lead their life on purpose. What would you say? 

 

Anthony Trucks 48:44 

How to live your life on purpose or lead your life on purpose? Did you say? Yeah, yeah. I'm going to say listen to the people around you, man. Because there are a lot of people around us that want to do well, but we don't listen to them. We want to shut them off. So, it's like a left. I think the focus that we should have been like if these people are giving me insight, they're doing it for a reason. Listen, your parents like to think about the age-old system of kids. They don't listen to their parents why do I want only the best for you. It's all I want. I want you not to go to jail. I want you to have a good education I want you to make some money I want you to live an amazing life so why don't you listen to me like it's doesn't make sense right? So, it's the same thing that happens in other parts of life we just don't listen to people so I think if we are able to listen to pay attention more we could live a pretty stinking cool life so if I can go back, I'm like bro listen to your coach, listen to your mom, listen to your teachers. Don't have an ego trip they’re there. Yeah, they're right. And you got to say you're wrong, the faster you can do that the better life gets. 

 

James Laughlin 49:41 

Phenomenal advice. For those listeners that are listening please take action on that one piece of advice. I'm certainly going to do that. That's phenomenal. Everyone's greatest obstacle that's ego, right? 

 

Anthony Trucks 49:52 

Yeah, ego man. It's also an opportunity because at the end of the day your ego shows up, but it will show up as an amazing opportunity. If you adjust the identity that is protecting shift that identity, it'll show up and be an amazing asset. 

 

James Laughlin 50:06 

Powerful, Anthony, thank you so, so much. I really appreciate it and best of luck with the continued book launch on your programs. I'll be following suit. I look forward to introducing you onstage in New Zealand one day, once we get this world back open again. 

 

Anthony Trucks 50:20 

Come in whenever you need me, I'm hopping on a flight if they'll let me. 

 

James Laughlin 50:23 

Love it! 

 

 

 

 

James Laughlin 50:42 

Thank you so much for listening in today and investing in your own personal growth. Please hit that subscribe button. I would love, love, love If you'd leave me a rating and review as it really helps me to impact more people. I've got some amazing guests lined up in the coming weeks and folks, it's that time. Get out there and live life on purpose.